Happy summer everyone!

This year I got involved with a group at UCLA called the Clothesline Project. It’s one you will find on many college campuses around the country that aims to stop multiple and intersecting forms of sexual violence. It strives to break the silence surrounding sexual violence and to raise awareness about these crimes that affect so many people.

The big event the group has is the three days where we put up a line of shirts in an area on campus. The shirts are decorated by survivors of different types of sexual violence and hung by clothespins on a line. The shirts are color coded to show the form of abuse and whether the victim survived the abuse they experienced.

-White represents those who died because of violence
-Yellow represents the battered or assaulted
-Red, pink, orange are for survivors of rape and sexual assault
-Blue and green represent survivors of incest and sexual abuse
-Purple represent those attacked because of their sexual orientation
-Black are for those who were attacked for political reasons

There’s a tent set up around where the shirts are hung for any survivors who stop by to go inside and make a shirt of their own if they like. Alexa joined me in LA for a couple of days and we each got to make one. This is a powerful way for victims to express how they feel about what happened to them and get it out in a unique fashion. Honestly, I had no idea what I wanted to put on mine…it’s tricky to condense so many emotions onto one shirt. Walking along the line, you’ll start looking at a shirt and as you continue going down one after the other it’s incredible to feel the anger, the hurt, and also to see the strength of each individual all displayed on a simple t-shirt and hanging side by side as if we are all standing together breaking the silence. Then to see the students who just happen to be walking by stop and really look at them, the shock on their faces is apparent as they read. There are just so many people who have no idea how often these types of incidents occur or even that they do at all.

What I really like about this group is the subtle yet powerful way they go about increasing awareness. The line catches your eye and really astonishes anyone passing by. Awareness and the voices of survivors are the most effective ways we can do something about this issue. To see all of the shirts representing such strong individuals makes me more proud than I can put into words and gives me the strength to never stop fighting. So thank you to all of you out there!

Best,
Courtney

Here’s an article I found from Sacramento, CA about the Governor telling state officials to “stop destroying sex offenders’ parole files and to make as much of their contents public as possible”. If you have the time, please read:

http://www.sacbee.com/2010/03/10/2595670/governor-tells-state-officials.html

This article inspires me, it gives me hope and I imagine will do the same for many of you. There are so many flaws in the current system and I know a lot of you have experienced this personally, the little ways that those who commit the crimes seem to get off easier than they should, or slip through the cracks when they shouldn’t. It’s extremely unfortunate, but happens quite often. The fact that they had even been shredding the files came as quite a shock to most people, it doesn’t even seem logical, who would have ever allowed that? Well the good thing is that the situation has been given attention and the shredding of sex offender files in California will no longer be an issue. I’m not quite sure what the situation is in other states, do any of you know? If not, I’d say it’s something to look into.

I know the constant reminder of the past is tough, it’s something that I’d like to think positively about and think you get used to, but I’m not really sure if I can honestly convince myself that’s possible. I recently had “ache” tattooed on my wrist. It’s something I’d been thinking about it and as someone who never ever thought I would ever get a tattoo, it was something I thought about for a long, long while. Did I really want a permanent reminder of my past and the huge problem of sexual abuse? I mean what if one day I decided I wanted to just forget it all, try to completely move on, erase the past and just live in the present and for the future. Not to mention that I decided to get it on my wrist, kind of depressing if you would just happen to see it haha but once I explain people understand. However, after talking with my sister I came to the obvious realization that this has all been a really big part of my life and all the memories and the impact that it’s had on me will always be there whether it’s in ink or not. It’s interesting, it’s actually quite empowering to have it. I’m proud of it, almost like it’s a battle scar and a sign that I survived. When I look at it, it reminds me that no matter how exhausting it gets to keep myself involved, or how hard it gets, I never want to stop talking about sexual abuse, I never want to stop trying to fight it.

I know it’s impossible to go out and stop every single sex offender or to make sure justice is served, but I can keep sharing my story and all that I’ve learned. Awareness is everything! Tell anyone anywhere and just like with this shredding situation in California, so many people didn’t realize it was even going on…the more people who know, the more people there are who can help to make a difference. So if you feel like you can, spread the word far and wide (even if it’s through sharing this website)! Each and every one of you has the power. Progress is possible

Thank you!

Courtney

PS If you are on Facebook – join our ACHE Foundation group!

Hello all,

I hope you’ve had a wonderful summer! I just want to thank you all for the support through the comments and stories you’ve shared it’s been so valuable to others to read and to see that although we’ve all felt alone going through these different events in our lives, we really aren’t alone at all.

I just wanted to share something I’ve been thinking about lately. I’m sure just about everyones seen the story about Jaycee Dugard and her two daughters in Antioch. It’s been all over the news lately and the other night I was watching it and hearing all of these people calling in talking about how appalled they were that Phillip Garrido, the man who abducted her 18 years ago and had been keeping her in his custody was actually a sex offender and was originally sentenced to 50 years in prison, a term which he only served about one-fifth of. No one could believe that this man who had commit these disgusting crimes was not only released from prison very early, but that now he was able to get away with holding Jaycee and her two daughters for 18 years before they were discovered. 18 years…that’s about how long I’ve been alive, just the thought of it is hard for me to wrap my head around. Hearing stories like this really confirm my fear that these people really do slip through the cracks and seemingly without much trouble…it’s disappointing, unacceptable, and far too common.

I’ll never forget the day my coach was sentenced, we went into the courtroom and since we didn’t have a trial they gave each of us girls and one of our parents the opportunity to stand in front of the court and say anything we wanted to. I had felt so confident about everything I was going to say, until I stepped up there with my parents by my sides and I opened my mouth to speak but couldn’t. My eyes began to water more than I knew was even physically possible, my legs went weak and if my parents hadn’t been there to hold me up I would’ve fallen to the ground. Every word that came out of our mouths that day were powerful and packed with emotion that everyone listening could feel. After everyone who wanted to speak had gone up, the judge said that we were more fortunate than others because it could’ve been worse, he told us that he wished we would all seek counseling so that we wouldn’t end up like him (our abuser), he went on to say that the amount of time he served wouldn’t really make much of a difference and that he listened to everything we had to say and had read each of the our impact statements, but the point of the justice system is to take the emotion out. My coach was sentenced to 3 years and served less than that.

I honestly don’t want to sound like I think that all judges, parole officers, etc are like this, but I’m afraid of the ones who are, the ones who let these people off easier than they should and allow sex offenders to slip through the cracks. It just seems too easy for them to go back to living normal lives even after they’re released from prison and are registered sex offenders. I find it frustrating because I know just how many people have gone through abuse or something related to this and still it’s a bigger issue than people allow themselves to realize.

This needs to change, we NEED it to. Talking about it is a good way to start and also writing to legislators, people who are supposed to listen to our concerns and represent our voice. You may not even realize how powerful sharing your story can be, but I can tell you from reading what all of you have shared with us, it makes me just so sad, so angry, and feeling like I want to do anything I can to make an impact. I want everyone to be aware of this issue, so they can care and do what they can to make it better. Please continue to share your stories because it does make a difference and we can do something about this, it can get better if we just continue to fight it together.

If you aren’t sure who you should be writing to you can find out here: https://writerep.house.gov/writerep/welcome.shtml

Thank you!

Courtney

Please find a chance to view the segments that aired on the ESPN E:60 news program and Good Morning America on April 15, 2008. Here are direct links to the videos:
E:60 – Violated »
Good Morning America – Accused Sex Offenders as Coaches »

Please come back and comment at ACHE so we and other visitors can hear your opinion.

Although her season was cut short due to an arm injury, see Alexa at her first meet as a Level 9 competing in no-handed gymnastics in Rocklin, CA in January 2008. Today, Alexa patiently waits to go back to gym full time, but continues to spread the word to people of all ages how it is important to tell someone if you are being abused.

We will be sharing our stories on ESPN. We are very excited to take part in this program to let others know that they are not alone. The ESPN segment will air on E:60 Tuesday, April 15th on ESPN and ESPN HD at 7pm EST/4pm PST. We are hoping you will support the ACHE Foundation by watching the show and passing on the information to others so that we can continue to spread the word that no one should be abused and you could save another child from being hurt by speaking out.

Courtney and Alexa with ESPN Correspondent Rachel Nichols and Video Crew

Hey, we wanted to thank everyone for sharing their stories and having so many people write to us. We are now starting a blog so it will be easier for everyone to talk to us and won’t take as long for us to respond. I know it’s hard but I hope everyone will continue to have the courage and strength to share their stories.